Recovery Strengths…Reflective

i know this is one of my flaws.  Procrastination.  No doubt about it.

You have seen the pictures of our kitchen.  i hope.  ‘Cause that means you read other blogs of mine.  i am touched.  But back to the kitchen.

Sometimes John has lapses in memory and these are exacerbated by any manner of distraction.  One day i was filling something on the kitchen counter.  i had the urge to pee, so i went into the bathroom.  I could hear a pump running and wondered what that was about and then remembered the container filling with water.

The counter was flooded and water was running into the sink the drawers; everywhere!  Many towels later, things were under control, but you know what happens to pressed wood when it gets wet.  Things luckily went back to shape, except for a couple of drawers Dan needed to sand down.

These are not uncommon events in my life.  Sarah has suggested i simply not fill things unless they are in the sink or i am committed to watching it.  Women!  Like that will ever happen.  Right after i read an instruction manual about how to use something.  i can figure this out.  Maybe not.

i noticed at that time of the flood, if the counter next to the wall had been caulked. it would not have leaked down into that area, at least, and damage could have been minimized.  i think i suggested we should have a small drain installed in the corner.

Let’s get this straight.  i know how to do caulking.  i am good at it.  That and painting.  There are my man skills.  That’s it.  So a couple of weeks ago, i looked at that little section, got the caulking and did it.  Good job.

I had put off doing that and it took all of fifteen minutes.  And that is a lot of what i have been doing lately.  Jobs i had put off in my depressive state.  Tightening things that i use every day and then think, “i’ll need to get that later.”

Let me tell you something.  When i am healthy, i do not procrastinate.  i get things done.  i hate looking at dirty dishes.  Just do them.  Takes a few minutes, unless i’ve had a dinner party.  Those i do in shifts.

For a while there, i thought i was going to have to get a tool box, i was fixing so many things.  i know what happened.  i was not motivated to do anything.  And the more i put things off, the more i got overwhelmed.

i was not overwhelmed because there was too much to do.  i was overwhelmed by the thought of even trying to do something.  Stop me if this sounds familiar to any of you out there.

Ok.  So what was the bullshit about being reflective?  Because when i am not sick that is what i’m like.  i usually take time to make decisions.  Lots of time.  The guy who writes a letter and then lets it sit for a few days before sending.  There is no twitter in this guy.i look at things from different angles and try to figure out the best course of action.  That is healthy, i think.

There is no antonym for procrastination.  i found that interesting.  i checked it out at a lot of English forums, trust me, and the best i could find was reflective or proactive.  Take your pick.

Being reflective is healthy.  Making choices based on sound judgement is sensible.  But when reflection turns into making excuses for not doing the things that need to be done- whatever they may be for you- then reflection has moved into the realm of procrastination.

Excuses.  We can find it easy to find them.  If someone would….then i would.  i would exercise, eat right, take my meds, not self-medicate, and so on,…if not for those people or my special situation.  Thinking is good.  Plan a strategy that will work for you.  Think carefully and make sure the safety nets are in place for the occasional terrible times that come along the way.

But don’t put it off.  You deserve healthiness, if nothing else, my friends.  At the risk of sounding crassly commercial, Just Do It.   Seriously.  It is the only way our lives will get better.

Here is a cool article that helped me.  Maybe have a look.  Or not.

Think…then do.


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